Man ask for ransom money from his own wife

KOTA KINABALU : A former civil servant who plans his own kidnapping has been arrested while withdrawing the ransom money from an automatic teller machine ( ATM ) here .

A civil servant arrested while withdrawing ransom
Picture is unrelated

The man send SMS through an unknown number to his 22-year -old wife and demanded ransom amount of RM 8000 and should be paid into a bank account . After the ransom was paid , her husband would be released. The man also send his selfie image as a proof that he was kidnapped on May 7.

After negotiate, the woman’s wife managed to reduce the ransom to RM 5000 and paid the amount into a bank account on May 15 before making a police report . A team was formed to investigate the case. Several policemen have been placed in several locations ATM to capture the kidnappers , but the man was arrested at about 3 o’clock in Kota Kinabalu instead.

Investigations revealed that the man was making plans to get money from his wife after being laid off . A plea has also been noted that the man acted alone and no other person involved . Jauteh added that the man ‘s wife did not know that her husband had been laid off.

Jauteh said the man was being investigated under Section 402 of the Penal Code for cheating .


P.s : What in the hell. What is in the  mind of the man? 

P.s.s : On second thought what if the man was forced by loan shark to ask for ransom because he cannot pay ahlong loan.

Why you should marry a teacher

Should you marry a teacher


Should we marry a teacher?

Three Sabahan couples marry and stay at the Hotel GrandBorneo for their honeymoons, where they are taken care of by Ugou the bellboy.

The first man married a nurse working at Hospital Queen Elizabeth Kota Kinabalu. Ugou thinks to himself, “Nurses are known to be sexy and hot.”

The second man married a Tone Excel marketer operator. Ugou thinks to himself, “Telephone operators have seductive and sexy voices.”

The third man married a secondary school teacher. Ugou thinks to himself, “Poor guy, teachers are always nagging.”

The next morning, Dave reports to work at Grand Borneo Hotel and gets a room service call from the nurse’s husband. He sourly says, “Don’t ever marry a nurse. All I heard last night was ‘You’re dirty, you’re dirty.'”

Then, the telephone operator’s husband calls and sourly says, “Don’t ever marry a telephone operator. All I heard last night was ‘Your three minutes are up, your three minutes are up.'”

Later that afternoon, the teacher’s husband calls and happily says, “When you marry, be sure to marry a school teacher. All I heard last night was ‘We are going to do this over and over until we get right.'”

P/s : This is a jokes only and not related to any living person or dead. Ketawa-ketawa bah kita dulu.

Too much choices

Cerita lawak sabah

A guy goes into a restaurant and is greeted by the hostess, who asks: “Smoking or non-smoking?” “Non-smoking,” he replies. He is seated and the waiter comes over to his table to take his drink order. “I’ll have a Coke,” he states. The waiter says: “Diet or Regular?” “Um, regular.” “Caffeine or caffeine-free?” “Uh, with caffeine.” The drink is brought to his table and the guy orders his food. The waiter asks what kind of dressing on the salad, “Italian, French, Thousand Island, raspberry vinaigrette?” He says: “Italian,” and the waiter immediately comes back with “regular Italian or fat-free?” “Regular,” says the man, with a hint of impatience in his voice.

And it goes on, with the steak order: “how do you want that prepared, rare, medium rare, medium, medium well, or well done?” and “how do you want your vegetables: raw, steamed, baked, boiled, blanched or fried?” and “how would you like your potatoes: baked, French fried, or mashed?”

Finally, the poor man has had enough and looks up to heaven and shouts: “I can’t TAKE all these choices!” He then turns his prayer to his patron saint saying: “St. Francis, HELP ME—help me with all these decisions!”

At that moment a big voice comes booming down and says: “Assisi, Xavier or DeSales?”

Kampung Danger dan pemandu teksi

Cerita ini berlaku di sebuah perhentian teksi.

Seorang wanita berbangsa Filipina menaiki sebuah teksi di Kota Kinabalu,Sabah.

Pemandu teksi itu pun bertanyakan kepada wanita tersebut “Cik mau pigi mana?”

Wanita Filipina itu menjawab “Sana kampung Dangir ya”.

Pemandu itu berasa hairan, kerana inilah pertama kali selama 10 tahun menjadi pemandu teksi, dia mendengar nama kampung itu.

Oleh kerana tidak tahu kampung itu dimana, dia bertanya sekali lagi kepada
wanita tersebut.”Di mana bah itu kampung Dangir?”

“Alamak, encik ni pemandu teksi baru ka? Itu kampung Dangir sana di
dakat kampung Likas bah, dakat itu tapak pembinaan bangunan kerajaan yang baru itu”
jawab wanita itu.

“OOOh di sana, bah mari la aku hantar kamu” kata pemandu teksi itu.

Lalu pemandu teksi itu pun menghantar wanita itu ke tapak pembinaan itu.

Kampung Danger Likas Sabah

Setibanya mereka di tapak pembinaan tersebut, wanita itu pun berkata “Nah kan, kamu tahu juga bah tempat ni, tengok papan tanda yang di situ itu ada tertulis nama kampung ini” kata wanita itu menunjukkan
jarinya ke sebuah papan tanda di situ yang bertulis “DANGER” (merbahaya).

Selepas kejadian itu, pemandu teksi tersebut tewas dan ketawa terbahak-bahak sehingga meninggal dunia akibat serangan strok.

P/s There is a lot of funny jokes in Sabah due to the multi ethnic in Sabah.

H1N1 alert in Likas Women and Children’s Hospital

PREVENTIVE MEASURES: Health dept tells public to seek immediate treatment

P/s :   I get the info about this H1N1 alert yesterday afternoon through whatsapp.  I read it and at first I don’t believe it and prefer to wait for the news from the authority. But when I came to Queen Elizabeth blood bank for a blood donation , I heard the nurse and medical assistant chatting about it  and one of them said that how can i sent my wife there for labour if the hospital is infected.  While I was laying down at the chair waiting for the blood bag to be filled I reconfirmed the info that I get from the whatsapp and they said its true. Anyway,  please read this article if you want to know whether we should panic or not by clicking this  link  Panic or not?


This is a copy of the news report from New Straits Times.

KOTA KINABALU: SABAH health authorities are taking the highest precautions to prevent the spread of influenza A (H1N1) following the recent detection of seven cases in a hospital here.

The patients, five of whom are children, at Likas Women and Children’s Hospital here are reportedly recovering well at press time.

State Health Department director Dr Christina Rundi said anti-viral drugs had been administered to the patients while 24 others were screened after they were believed to have been at risk of being exposed to the virus.

“The ward has been disinfected while an operation centre was opened on Tuesday to control the situation.

“Staff have been instructed to take leave if they are sick and increase hygiene practices, including proper hand-washing and wearing face masks.”

She said the hospital had also started limiting visitors.

Health education has been conducted for the public to inform them on how to identify symptoms which include flu, fever, sore throat, diarrhoea and body ache. They were also taught preventive measures, and to seek immediate treatment.

Influenze A is contagious via respiratory droplets, with senior citizens, children younger than 5, pregnant women, and people of any age with certain chronic medical conditions being especially vulnerable.

Sabah reported 944 infections during a global pandemic in 2009, 145 in 2010, 26 in 2011, and six last year.

Besides the seven in hospital, another case was reported recently in Sandakan, bringing the total number of cases so far this year to eight.

At press time, the source of infection has yet to be identified.

Sources said the first case to be identified at the Likas hospital was a child who was warded with kidney problems.

Legally dead

Kota Kinabalu High Court Jokes
The courtroom clerk of Kota Kinabalu Bar recorded this exchange between an anonymous attorney and a pathologist in a recent murder trial :

“Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?”


“Did you check for breathing?”


“So then, is it possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?”


“How can you be so sure?”

“Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.”

Even then, this would-be Perry Mason refused to throw in the towel:

“Is it possible the patient could be alive, nevertheless?”

“It is possible that he could have been alive,” said the pathologist, “and practicing the law somewhere.”

P/s This JOKE is a work of fiction. All character names, organizations, incidents and any other names, phenomena and such, are fictional as well.

SESB will not giving discount following January 2014 blackout


KOTA KINABALU: Electricity consumers in Sabah will face the full brunt of the new tariff that came into effect on Jan 1 this month as Sabah Electricity Sdn Bhd ruled out giving a ‘discount or rebate’ following the Jan 16 state-wide blackout.

The company’s managing director Abdul Razak Sallim said that they could not give rebate, as SESB was also a victim of the blackout that triggered by a sudden shutdown of generators at a independent power producer at Teluk Salut in Sepanggar here.

”SESB is also a victim of circumstances. In fact, the revenue we get now is not enough for us to operate. So there is no way that we can give discounts,’’ he said when asked if the utility company would give a discount in their January bills.

Over 500,000 consumers were affected by the nearly eight hour blackout with many, including political parties, calling on SESB to provide a rebate as compensation for the blackout after the new electricity tariff rates came into effect from Jan 1.

Razak said that that in initial findings for the failure of the Sabah power grid was triggered by a “manual shutdown” of four engines at an IPP in Sepangar here.

Quoting a letter from the IPP, Razak said the IPP had said; its “diverter damper” door, which covers the gas connection from the turbines to power up a steam turbine at the plant, could not be shut.

As smoke was continuously coming out of the plant, they decided to shut down the gas turbines.

However, Razak said that detailed investigations were still underway by a special task force, including the Energy Commission to determine if human error or technical problems triggered the problem.

Energy Commssion west coast areas director Nazlin Ab Alim Sidiri said that the detailed report of the incident would be forwarded to the Energy, Green Technology and Water Ministry to decide whether to launch further indepth investigations.

”The IPPs and SESB have been licensed to transmit power to consumers. If we find out any potential for either of them to have saved and restored the power but still failed to do so, their licence could be revoked,’’ she said.

Source :


P/s : In my opinion the IPP should take responsibility on the blackout.